Posted by Talula on November 24, 2007
As i sit here tonite checking on my businesses after the Thanksgiving holiday and camping trip; I long for a simpler time. I had thought last week that going camping with my grandchildren would translate into a simpler version of this uncomplicated holiday; however it turned out to be just as complicated and tiring as the usual “Turkey Day” with all the trimmings (family rifts and all). How can we undo this chaotic American life that goes by with warp speed everyday and is considered “normal” in today’s mainstream American society?
I know of individual folks whom have stopped and gotten off the merry-go-round with intention; but for most of the rest of us, it is still a constant struggle to find a rare moments peace from this hectic pace. I am beginning to see much evidence in the damage it is doing to our young children that have simply forgotten how to be in their natural state of curiosity. They are so used to being taken from one planned activity after another (school, sports, lessons, playdates); that they have to learn all over again how to relax, observe & learn from nature around them when it is not totally organized FOR them. I actually fear for their future after realizing this. How will they survive on their own in a few years as young adults if they cannot function without totally planned & organized days. I fear that they will only function well in institutions like the military. Alas! I cannot change this path for them; their parents must do it within each family. but who will show the parents? Again; I am no longer in education; so I cannot make much of an impact anymore: except one child at a time! Won’t you try to re-assess your priorities to show your children how to slow down and learn to observe nature, find ways to help the earth and/or its inhabitants and to communicate well with each other? The ultimate goal here is a peaceful world, not a totally filled daily planner book!
I was also on another blog today and ran across posts and comments about Adoptive parents of bi-cultural or multi-cultural children who treat their adoptive children badly for being ungrateful that they “saved” the child from their original culture and family tragedy and deny the children any access to their original culture or ancestral information. To me as an educator; this is a horrible situation that unfortunately happens much too often with adoptive families. Children some sort of cultural information base upon which to build their own identity. They must figure out who their “I” is; before they can figure out their place in a family and then society as a whole. Relationships which give them an achor of love, human kindness and compassion help children learn who they are by helping know their past relationships, their beginnings and eventually their future as a person. It takes a strong heart to allow a child to question and challenge our beliefs, agendas and behaviors as they learn how to form their own personality & belief systems. My heart goes out to all kind and loving parents (natural & adoptive) who are in this struggle to help their children grow into beautiful human beings who will grace this earth and all of it’s inhabitants!
On the subject of adoption; my company has a new title out that might help some of the adoptive parents to communicate the connection to their birth culture in general and in particular; the Chinese culture for adopted children from China. Since there are many Asian children adopted here in America; I thought this would make a good starting point for many families.
The name of the book is “Motherbridge of Love” written by Chinese activist Xinran, published by Barefoot Books; with part of the profits of the books going to her organization for Chinese women & children. Perhaps this book could open discussions on issues surrounding adoptive & birth families. If you are interested you can go to my online bookstore to have a look to see if it could be helpful to you. Click on the Barefoot Button below!

Posted in Barefoot Books, Children & Grandchildren, Children's Books, Children's Global Issues, Families, Great Books For Grown-Ups, Multi-Cultural | Tagged: children, adoption, multi-cultural adoption, books on Chinese adoptions, Motherbridge of Love, Xinran, chaotic American society, musings on fast paced life, | 1 Comment »